Daddy's tool for the Autism blues

First Blog. About the blog

I love to write.  I have to write.   My mind becomes burdened with scenario’s, possibilities and the like.  At time’s I need to purge.  And at the end the day start with a clean slate of new dreams, and disasters. Parenting and Special needs parenting are typically the most purge worthy thoughts I have.  So expect a lot of that.


My blog.  Will reference my own youth.  That statement is really just an excuse to allow me to talk about something this blog is Not about.  That’s grammar. Mine sucks.  I got it,  Move on please.  Its also not about politics or religion.  I believe much of both these things are less about including others.  And more about excluding them.   My blog is really a story about me.  I hope at some point the kids can write there own stories. I dont think it’s my place to imply I can write that for them.   I have done the things I have,  out of the selfish desire to leave a legacy.  To end my journey through life thinking that I have done right by my children.  I hope the blog can entertain and help be at least a small light for parents and special needs parents.


I was not a particularly good kid myself.  Nor a good young adult for that matter.  In spite of having great parents of my own.  So some of the blog will be about me evolving into my image of a dad.


Having kids changes a person.  At least it changed me.  All I want  for my kids is to be happy healthy and wise.  I want for them, a path that allows them to be the people they enjoy being.  I want to provide them with the tools they need.  And maybe most of all.  I want them to have an easy smile.


Being my first blog entry I am not really sure the proper way to begin.  My casual passion is about having fun with things that aren’t typically considered fun. Its the spark of fun that hides.   I see it with well placed irony and sarcasm. Or in the laugh / cry moments.   I revel in making fun of people and things in a way that they also, can find the humor in “The high road of humor”.  I believe with all my heart and soul that family should be fun.  And at times fun has to be worked for.  Sure there are times in a family when there is, “poop on a wall”.  But hey,  even that can be funny in time. Lets face it there are only two ways a person can handle “Poop on the wall”

  2. Or “Hey,  Guess what I found on the wall?”

I also hope to enlighten from time to time. To share some of the more formal parent / special need parent training I have acquired.  I will speak about what ” I have had success” with.  That does not mean I am remotely an expert.  Just what worked for us.    I will breech a couple of “soap box” topics.  And you may even find me on a rant occasionally.


I am writing for fun.  I do fantasize that the blog may evolve into a source of income that would allow me to work from home and devote more time to special needs causes, my kids, and also to have cool car’s, get hair implants and have fantastic tropical vacations .  But for now at least.  Its just that, a fantasy.


My second and more studied passion is special needs and parenting in general.



Sooo Cool

Sooo Cool

My son, Code name Green,  is a NT (Nero-typical) 13 year old.


How can you be mad at Tarzan

And much like myself at his age already “Know’s it all” .  We keep pictures of him from his baby years through toddler, hung on the walls.

They keep him from being duct taped to a chair or sold to Gypsies.   Rarely does a day pass that I don’t come across a felony avoiding picture.    Although I have found that if I take the time like any good parent.  And listen, really listen.  Using all the techniques like “Active listening” getting on his level and such.  I find that he is almost completely impossible to talk to.  I think his goal in life is being “Green hoodie wearing man”  I can explain to him it’s 100 deg f out.  “wearing the hoodie”  In the pool?  “wearing the hoodie”  Core temps?, Body odor?, ect.  “wearing the hoodie”. He has a secondary goal of confusing us into submission I.E.  “I couldn’t clean my room,  because you kept nagging me to clean my room”.   One of our favorite activities is trying to scare one another.  Yes probably not the most well thought out thing I have ever done.  But it’s such a rush when his little knees fold and he tries to force his feet to run.   He, like his father (me) is clearly ADHD.  And I know many parents say “we don’t want to medicate our kids.”  Believe me when I say the choices were that, or restraints.  It is also my understanding (from people who know) that the apple did not roll far from the tree.  More on him throughout the blog.


My daughter is the sweetest, most cutest 11 year old in the world,  Ever,

Daddy's girl

Daddy’s girl


who also happens to be Autistic.  Although it is not completely clear.  I would say she falls somewhere in the middle, of the middle, of the center, of the spectrum.  When you think of Autism and traits associated with that.  She has most,  if not all.  Because of this she has many labels.  From ASD to MR and then there is my personal favorite label “Daddies Girl”.   Ironically it appears that one of the most challenging things ever in my life.  Is also the most rewarding.  Autism is a part of who she is.  And the truth is I would miss her quirks if they were gone.  I would miss her look when I stand at the threshold of her doorway.  Looking at her angelic face holding the last blade from the ceiling fan in her hands.  I had watched her from my car outside her window tear off the fan blade as she jumped from the dresser,,,, to the bed (across the room).  And yes this was completed one blade at a time. At this point I,  of course am Obligated to say.   “No more jumping and tearing off fan blades!” 🙁  My guess is that the fan was causing some sensory issues.  And she handled it herself.  Much like she handles a lightly loose tooth herself.    I would also miss her random one word joke’s like “Cheeseburger!” that bring us endless joy and laughter.  Or her random dance moves.  If I were to make a wish,  and change something.  It would only be that joy, happiness, and success come easy for her.


My wife and I are more like supervisors or managers.  We have a functional working relationship.  In all likelihood I will not talk to much about that on the blog.  And I think there are several legitimate reasons for that.  First,  she can read.  Second, we occasionally disagree.  Third, she can read.  So in my best effort to keep the peace.  I will not talk much on that subject.  Other than to acknowledge that due to the travel requirements of my real job.  Much of her time is spent basically,  being a single parent of a teen and a special needs child.  Not a small task by anyone’s definition.


On to the soup and potato’s of the blog.


What is a GillyWacker?  I don’t know who invented the term.  My dad taught it to me and it goes something like this:  Head Thinker,  Eye’s Seeier,  Nose Smeller,  Mouth Eater,  Chin Chopper,,,,,,,,,,,,GillyWWWWWWWWWWacker! wildly tickling whoever is the intended victim.  I believe my daughter currently holds the world record for most Wackered.  When you understand that.  You understand that GillyWacker is never far from my mind or my heart.

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